Nobody should have to live in an unhappy and coercive relationship.
These are some of my ideas of a good partner
He or she-
Does not force you to do things you don’t want to do,
Respects your boundaries (see my post on setting your boundaries)
Does not have double standards, for example goes mad if they think you are flirting but flirts themselves.
Respects your hobbies, career and aspirations
Encourages you to see your friends or family
Does not laugh at or ridicule things you say or show you up in front of other people
Respects your need for sleep and rest.
Does not intimidate you for example by glaring or trapping you in rooms or taking away your car keys
Doesn’t ‘punish’ you when you annoy them or don’t do something they say, by canceling a meal out for example or making you late for an event you were looking forward to.
Does not cut off financial sources so that you are financially dependent on them
Cares enough to treat you sometimes
Helps with chores
Doesn’t fly into a rage over the least little thing
Is not paranoid about everything including when you try to look nice saying ‘who are you dressing up for then?’ in an ominous way
Takes care of your property
Listens to you and comforts you when you are upset
Doesn’t continually say bad stuff about you to other people including the children if you have them
Doesn’t cheat on you