What makes a good relationship

Nobody should have to live in an unhappy and coercive relationship.

These are some of my ideas of a good partner

He or she-

Does not force you to do things you don’t want to do,

Respects your boundaries (see my post on setting your boundaries)

Does not have double standards, for example goes mad if they think you are flirting but flirts themselves.

Respects your hobbies, career and aspirations

Encourages you to see your friends or family

Does not laugh at or ridicule things you say or show you up in front of other people

Respects your need for sleep and rest.

Does not intimidate you for example by glaring or trapping you in rooms or taking away your car keys

Doesn’t ‘punish’ you when you annoy them or don’t do something they say, by canceling a meal out for example or making you late for an event you were looking forward to.

Does not cut off financial sources so that you are financially dependent on them

Cares enough to treat you sometimes

Helps with chores

Doesn’t fly into a rage over the least little thing

Is not paranoid about everything including when you try to look nice saying ‘who are you dressing up for then?’ in an ominous way

Takes care of your property

Listens to you and comforts you when you are upset

Doesn’t continually say bad stuff about you to other people including the children if you have them

Doesn’t cheat on you